The stress of college is inevitable this year. Junior year is one of the best years, but I feel like I am not good enough. I always doubt myself in many situations and I am a dreadful test-taker. Everyone around me looks like a genius in my eyes and I just want to achieve success.
I feel so much pressure on my shoulders due to my my parents not wanting me to repeat errors that maybe my sisters have made in the past. I get so nervous because I don't want to mess up, and I want to be as smart as possible.
Today I ended up bombing my first APUSH test and it made me want to cry so hard. I gathered my strength to stay calm and realize that everything happens for a reason. It is really hard to think that way because I feel like I let myself down in every aspect today. I had a spanish quiz which I did not do the best on and a really hard math test. Yes, this was all in one day..
My thing is that I have God and that is all that matters. Even if I am struggling in some classes the Lord made me choose those certain classes for a reason. I am here to be successful at Hayfield Secondary School. The lesson here in exhibiting this difficult day would be to always stay positive. The devil always tries to find ways to bring you down but in the end you will prevail against him.
In the aftermath of this day I realized that even when things get tough, I will never give up in any way whatsoever. Being strong and studying harder is the key to success. I must make sure to participate in every aspect of Hayfield and start my club. I am so happy to be in the process of starting the Christian Fellowship Association. I feel like God wants me to make a difference at Hayfield by starting this bible study oriented club.
Adding one thing I always feel like I have to be perfect which is NOT TRUE. I should never feel that way because I will never be perfect. Every human being makes mistakes and it is he/she's job to correct those mistakes and improve themselves. I might not be the skinniest girl in town and that is a weakness of mine but I am working on a healthy lifestyle slowly but surely. Everyone will see when I become a health fanatic in due time.
Lastly with making friends at Hayfield it is tricky. There are many people who I could see myself being friends with. There are actually two girls that I could really see myself being close friends with at the end of the year! I am so happy I signed up for AP Psychology!!! They are genuinely so kind and unlike their other group of friends. I know a lot of fake people at Hayfield but in the end, when people realize high school is over they will mature over the years. Many people are wrapped up in this idea of being popular, and that is why some of these cliques form and I do not want to be apart of that NO MATTER WHAT! I just love people and school, so that is why I want to experience many memories that I will cherish forever in my heart.
I currently feel blessed with my life and I will always have God on my side no matter what. <3
PSALM 106:1
Praise the Lord.
Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good;
his love endures forever.
